Yesterday I had an appointment with my fertility doctor down here. I had in my mind the perfect scenario of what would happen...that she would run more tests and then we could start IUI (which, in a nutshell is artificial insemination, but with Randy's stuff...That just helps it get to where it needs to go). In reality, I knew she might not have my records from Hershey, and that she may very well take the view of my last Dr...that I should just be grateful for what I have.
I prayed the entire way to the appointment. (And it was an hour and a half drive...without getting lost. However, when you get lost it takes 2 hours and 10 minutes) I walked into her office and felt completely overwhelmed. It was HUGE, much larger than at Hershey, and she is the only Dr. Hershey's was shared among 4 or 5. I thought there was no way she was really going to listen to me and my concerns.
I went back and a nursing student took my vitals (and they were wrong). Then the medical assistant came in and asked all the same questions I had already answered. They were doing some surgical procedures, so Dr. Whitman-Ella was running just a little behind. Then she came in.
The first thing I noticed was how kind her eyes were. She went over my history with me (including the cervical surgery and subsequent severe blood loss) and reviewed our test results from Hershey Med. I expressed my concern about the cervial surgery and then braced myself for her opinion that it doesn't matter, the cervix plays such a small role in the pregnancy, blah blah blah. (Which is what Dr Dodson said, and what I've seen frequently on the internet) She looked at me and said she was convinced that was the problem, and that, assuming I was ok with it, we would start IUI next cycle. Those of you who know me can attest that the fact I was rendered speechless was pretty amazing. Dr Whitman asked what fertility enhancers I wanted. She agreed with me that something would be a good idea to increase the chances of it working by producing more eggs, and that it does increase the quality of the eggs. I told her whatever it was, I wanted it low dose, since I do produce eggs on my own. She agreed.
She got called into surgery at that point. But she took the time to explain the IUI protocol to me, and asked if I had any questions. At no point did I feel even a little rushed. I did ask her what could I do to increase the chances of the procedure working, aside from taking pre-natals. Then I waited for her to tell me that my weight was an issue (Remember...the other doctor said he didn't really want to touch me until I lost 20 pounds. I never went back on Weight Watchers) She looked at me and said to do accupuncture, then changed her mind because of the bleeding disorder, so she suggested Yoga. She basically just told me to relax. She said she saw no need for me to worry about losing weight; that while I'm not at the ideal weight, it's not enough to hinder my fertillity. I could have kissed her. Trish wants to bake a cake for her. This woman is so kind. Her assistant came in and reviewed the IUI protocol with me (Back on Clomid, oh joy).
I left the office in tears, I was so happy. I feel a huge sense of relief. I know I've been saying that I knew I would have another baby, but deep down, I was so terrified that I wouldn't be able to carry my own child. I have nothing against adoption (without it, who knows where Randy would be), but I really wanted to be pregnant again, and to experience being happy about the 2nd line. I hadn't realized how much hope I had lost until I had it back. I am so thankful that I found Dr Whitman. Who knew? All the research I did on Dr Dodson, and I hated him, but assumed his physician skills made up for his lack of bedside manner. I found Dr Whitman on the internet, and did little research beyond her certifications and success rates. I am so thankful that I've found her. She and her staff are so amazingly wonderful.
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