One of these days....

I will actually keep up with this thing. For now though...

Just to catch everyone up (for those who actually read this)...Wyatt and I have moved back to MD. We are living at my mom's for now. I'm honestly not sure how that's going to go. The original plan was to live here so I could go back to school, but I forgot how much better Mom and I get along when we aren't in the same house.

Mocha, my sweet German Shepherd, the best dog EVER died this week. It's still a little hard to deal with.

Wyatt has started first grade. I'm not sure how I feel about his school. His homework is still along the lines of counting to 20. He's a little beyond that.

We went to the county fair yesterday. He had SO MUCH fun. His favorite part? Hanging out with the firefighters. I swear, this kid....

I will update more, and I really could go into so much more detail about all this, but it's early, and I don't even really want to be awake right now.

Ahhhh

Alright. Lots to blog about today! (I'm really trying to keep up with this, can you tell?)

First, my baby boy is a first grader. How did that happen? He is amazing. I'm so very very proud of him. He is such an incredible blessing. I will post pictures once I upload them.

Randy and I sat down and really talked last night about the whole decision for school next year. We both ruled out public school. (No offense to any of you, but, well, it's not the right choice for us.) As far as homeschooling, we both know I can do it, and do it well, and I want to do it. The problem is, and this is me being honest, I frequently start things off with the best of intentions, and then kinda let it fade out. I CAN'T let that happen with Wyatt. So, we are going to go to the homeschooling convention and decide from there.

Randy said he wants me to stay home once Wyatt starts school. I told him that makes me feel so guilty, especially if he's in school. He said it shouldn't. For one thing, when I'm working, I get home, and am typically too tired to cook. (Remember, I don't get to sit down at work) We are going to take this summer to see how we do just living on his salary, and to make sure that our marriage is really going to work. (Although, I have to say, KNOWING it's going to work makes a big difference)

Wyatt starts with the new sitter today. I'm excited. I really like her, she seems so much like me. She's so laid back, and I really think that's what Wyatt should have, especially over the summer. I can't wait to see how his first day is!

Oh good grief....

So this morning I woke up to the dog vomiting everywhere. I mean, I'll take that over the boy vomiting, but...I'd really much rather wake up to the rooster that hides in my cell phone that usually wakes me up. Could the boy sleep through the excitement? Of course not! This makes 4 mornings this week he's been up since before 5:30. Hide me. No, wait, don't do that...because that means someone, somewhere, will be counting to 10 before they seek.

So, yesterday...I was uber productive. I did day 1 of my Bible study. I jogged, I did arobics. Oh, and I hula hooped. It was all on the Wii, but it's gotta be better than playing Facebook games. And believe me, I was sore. Yay for a big bath tub. I would have walked laps around my yard, but that freezing rain kept me from doing that. (Finally! A reason for freezing rain) I also uploaded some photos and video from my dad's birthday party. See? Productivity. I am awesome. And modest.

Wyatt got his report card. Now, in Kindergarten, the grading system is different. S is Satisfactory, P basically means progressing toward year end goals, and N is Needs Improvement. I am happy to say Wyatt got all S's, except for 2 P's. And those were in Handwriting, which he had N's for last quarter. Go Wyatt!

The job hunt really isn't going anywhere for now. It's so frustrating. I've applied everywhere I can think of. Once I have a job, Randy is moving back to PA.

Which brings me to another point....Even though the separation is a mutual thing, and I'm the one who brought it up, I still have my doubts. It's so hard. But I know my doubts come from the fact that Randy and I really are friends. There's no bitterness, and I truly believe he feels the same way. Plus, I like my life. I like being a housewife and a room mom for Wyatt's class. But those aren't reasons to stay married, right? I just can't see the physical feelings I have for Randy changing at all. I'm completely happy now, when we are in separate bedrooms. But that's not a marriage. And I know that. I don't want Wyatt to think this is what love looks like. I really do wish we could make it work, but I at least know that we've really tried.

Let's move along, shall we?

So I went in for my baseline ultrasound yesterday. My ovaries are clear, and I was given the go ahead to start Clomid. The ultrasound tech made a gasp noise as she was doing the U/S, and I asked her why. Turns out, my cervix is the smallest she's seen. She said I'd need a circlage. I told her I had been pretty sure I would, so there was no great surprise. I go back in Oct 2 for a Follicle Scan. There, they will see how many mature follicles I have. (Basically, they will estimate how many eggs I will release this cycle) Then they let me know when to do the trigger shot, and 36 hours later I will get pregnant, in theory. Randy can't go to the FS because Wyatt has soccer pictures. Ah well, that's not the one he needs to be at. And who really wants to see their wife's ovaries on a fuzzy black and white TV screen? I did realize yesterday that if I get pregnant this cycle, I will have a June baby. I feel that my odds just skyrocketed :) (I have been pregnant with 3 June babies) So that's what's going on there.

I woke up this morning to find my husband put not one, but TWO coats of paint on the kitchen walls last night. Wow. I can't believe he got so much done. I am spoiled :) Plus, I think he knows to just do what he can to keep me happy when I'm on Clomid. Imagine a lion in a cage at the zoo, and the zookeeper kind of throwing food through the bars. Yeah, that's us right now.

Wyatt's doing really well in soccer. He participates so much more this year than he did last year. School is going ok, this week so far he's had 3 "green faces" (for good behavior). He had one yellow, (or maybe it was red) but that's ok, we are focusing on the green ones. He does really well with reading. His handwriting is really where I see a huge need for improvement. We are working on it!

I know, I know. I'm sorry!

I haven't written in about 2 weeks. I'm sorry! I'm a terrible blogger. We haven't settled on the house in PA yet (grrr) so we haven't been able to do some stuff down here...like get internet. So for now I'm using Verizon Wireless for internet and it STINKS!

Wyatt has started his school (He's been going for 2 weeks now) He goes to Laurence Manning Academy, and he LOVES it. Homework...well, that he's not so thrilled with. I don't have the heart to tell him it gets harder than tracing and coloring. We've finally figured out our afternoon routine. When he gets home he gets half hour to do whatever, then he sits down to do homework. At first I was having him do homework right away, and that was NOT working. This new routine seems to work well. Let's hope it stays that way!

Mornings....ahhh....mornings are NOT easy in our house. Unless, of course, I want to sleep in. Then he's up at the crack of dawn. But on a school day, I have to drag him out of bed. I thought I had at least 10 years until I had to deal with this kinda stuff!

Wyatt has a loose tooth :) He's so cute, now every book that he checks out of the library is about loose teeth. They get to check out a book, bring it home, and once they read it to mom or dad, it goes back and a new one comes home. Apparently our library has a lot of books about loose teeth.

Wyatt's school's athletic logo is an orange paw. Wyatt now insists that we be fans of Clemson, since they have the same orange paw. *Sigh* He really is growing up so fast, but I didn't expect to have his college picked out already!

Randy is down here. Originally he wasn't going to be here until after settlement, but his last day of work came and went, and settlement didn't, so....here he is :)

Alright, I must go nudge the boy. More like jump on his bed, since that's what it takes to wake him up.

Wow....

I looked at the calendar this morning and realized I only have 11 days left in this state (Commonwealth, whatever) And those 11 days are BUSY. I'm going to MD for 2 or 3 of them, some family is coming up for another, other family is coming up for 3 other days, I work, Randy works, we have 2 trips to Hersheypark planned, tonight I'm taking Wyatt to the racetrack...there's always something! Plus, I really want to get some more stuff packed. I want to make it so that all that's out is wtuff to keep Randy entertained and clothed and fed for the 2 weeks I'm down there and he's up here. He's got a hard enough job with loading the uhaul, I'd at least like to make it easy for him.

I have found a coffee maker that I must have. It's a cuisinart Keurig combo. It makes iced tea, 5 different size coffees....I want it. I will have it. It's got quiet brew technology. The Keurig I have now is pure awesomeness, but it's VERY noisy. And, I will be living in SC, I will have to be able to produce sweet tea on demand. :)

I can't believe in 2 weeks my baby starts Kindergarten. I think I had more issues with Pre-K than I do with this. I'm really not overly upset or anxious. Yet. I'm excited for him. I think the first day he's at school I will probably just wander around the house lost. Randy won't be there yet, I should have the stuff I'm bringing unpacked. Yup, staring at the walls...that's what I shall do. Now that I put it that way...You know, I will have fun. I will go into the city, do some window shopping, maybe just drive around and explore the area. Yup, I will have fun

Finally have news...

...and I just haven't felt like sitting down to type. Go figure.

Last night was National Night Out. We went to Logan Park, and Wyatt got to "fly" a military helicopter. I think he had a good time. I was working, and we had a couple of calls, but otherwise, it was a good time. I gotta say, stuff like that really makes me realize how much we will miss this area and our friends. It's truly a great area to raise a family, and our friends are wonderful. I hope we are doing the right thing. I know we are, but it's still very bittersweet.

OK, so...now for the news...Yesterday, at 8am I got a phone call....There was an opening in Wyatt's kindergarten class. Soooo...he will be going to private school. :) YAY! I feel so at peace and even excited about that. Not that I ever doubted my ability to homeschool. I wanted to, but I didn't feel the excitement about it that other people have. And then finding out that the ONLY homeschool group in our area only has 5 members...That just didn't seem like Wyatt would have the socialization that I wanted for him. So then I found out orientation dates, etc for Wyatt's school. Then I started thinking that it's possible for us to be down there in time for him to start, but it would depend on the school letting us pay after settlement. Lots of stuff in the air. Long story short, they approved him starting with his class and us paying late, and Wyatt and I are moving August 19. I really didn't want him (or I) to miss orientation. It's a new area, neither of us know anything about the school, and there are already so many adjustments our family has to make. If I can do anything to make them easier, well, that's my job. So he and I will go down with the dogs and a small trailer packed with enough to last us for 2 weeks until Randy can follow with the moving truck. Lots to do now! I'm glad I got most of the packing done up to this point. Now it's mostly figuring out what we need to take with us, and then cleaning the house so Randy just has to do a bit of a touch up before he comes down.

This whole thing is very bittersweet for me. The mood swings definitely aren't helping, LOL. I know it will all work out, I have faith in that.

Not too bad so far...

I finished my 2nd (and last) Clomid cycle. Other than waking up sweaty a few times, this cycle was not bad at all. Hopefully the side effects are done and won't last forever. Well, I did have a mood swing or 2 but nothing that *I* think was too bad :) Maybe next cycle I will do herbal stuff, maybe I won't do anything. I don't know. I think I'm just going to take it as it comes for right now. I do have an appointment with a fertility doctor once we move (the waiting list for those things is usually pretty long, so I scheduled it now)

I've looked into support groups/co-ops for homeschooling, and there really isn't much in the county that I'm in. I'm sure we will find something, even if it's by joining one of the groups in a larger city. If I have to travel once a month, that's not too bad. Completely worth it for Wyatt to get the whole experience, in my opinion. And I think it will help me feel better about everything, just to have someone local to talk to about it all. I'm still on the fence about private school, but at the moment it's not an option anyway.

Lately I've felt like there is just so much to do, and I will never find a way to get it all done. I have lists everywhere, even a list of lists. I just feel....discombobulated. Last night I went to make pancakes for dinner, only to find that I packed the measuring cups and mixing bowls. So I was going to make tacos, but....you guessed it, the seasoning was packed. Stuff I meant to leave out, but apparently didn't. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I've packed what I have because I know it will be easier in a few weeks, but right now I just feel...out of sorts I guess. It doesn't help that we are trying to be creative for meals and use what we have without going to the store, and that makes me feel more disorganized. I can't wait to get back on my diet and maybe start working out. I do know that getting up early and having time to myself helps. It gives me a chance to read, pray, and just prepare myself for the day.

Today Wyatt has camp, and then I work at 6pm. 3 more shifts...is it over yet? I've already made a list of stuff I want to get done today, so hopefully it will happen. I'm going to try not to let myself doze off today...It's so hard for me to sleep at work, that I'm hoping if I go in really tired I will be able to. Of course, that almost guarantees we will have a busy night, and there will be no sleep. I really love what I do, but I find myself maintaining that count down. I think in my heart I know that I would rather be at home with my family.